Everyone ISN’T beautiful

Have you heard Alessia Cara’s new radio single “Scars To Your Beautiful”?

Some lyrics:

You should know you’re beautiful just the way you are
And you don’t have to change a thing
The world could change its heart
No scars to your beautiful, we’re stars and we’re beautiful

She told Cosmo, “It was important to put that in my own words and remind people that they are beautiful no matter what.” That is sweet and I’m sure her heart is in the right place, but…CRINGE. Another “Everyone is beautiful!!!!!1” anthem meant to be empowering but totally missing the point.

I am ALL for self-acceptance. 1,000% percent. But saying everyone is beautiful is just bullshit.

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In defense of being girly

Which one of these is socially unacceptable?
Which one of these is socially unacceptable?

Remember Sk8r Boi by Avril Lavigne? (If you were a teenager in 2002, you feel me.) The gist is that a pretty girl who did ballet had the hots for the eponymous male, but she turned up her nose. She ends up at home feeding her baby. What an idiot, right? How dare she be pretty, like ballet, and have a kid? It’s not enough that she’s a snob; Avril has to make her uber-feminine. Avril even wears a tie in her videos, as if to say, “Don’t worry, I’m punk and aggro and have all these traits traditionally associated with dudes while simultaneously being nonthreatening and conventionally attractive and fuckable.”

For a while, that was my M.O. too. I thought being an empowered badass feminist meant taking a shit on everything girly. I hated blonde sorority girls, fake tanning, early education majors, and anything “prissy.” For some reason Legally Blonde and Romy & Michelle’s High School Reunion were fine, great even (probably because they valued friendship over dudes). But I rejected all other aspects of femininity. (Fake nails? Are you a stupid vapid bimbo?) I thought an integral part of feminism was Daria and Angela Chase in My So-Called Life, wearing shapeless flannel and scowling and refusing to learn how to cook.

Turns out hating other women isn’t very feminist at all.

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When cops kill black people

On Friday, Tulsa cop Betty Shelby shot and killed Terence Crutcher, an unarmed black man. His hands were up. Cops came to the scene because his car broke down. Literally the only thing he did was be a black man.

Shelby is on paid leave right now. She should go to jail. Will she? Probably not.

Currently reading Between the World and Me, and it’s so so good. I’m tired of living in a society bent on destroying black bodies.

The only way things will change is if we put pressure on the people with power and privilege. MAKE A FUSS. Be the squeaky wheel. Don’t accept this.

Here’s contact info for the Tulsa police chief, Chuck Jordan:


Chief Chuck Jordan
600 Civic Center
Tulsa, OK 74103-3822

I’m done just being sad and hoping it won’t happen again.

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